Gregg at ECW has a piece about the defense of an accused drunk driver that he was able to rescue from the jaws of pre-trial conviction and return his client to normal citizen status. DUI is the new crie de couer for the obsessively over controlling of our society. In one way, it is way too easy. Mothers Against Drunk Driving doesn't have a version on the other side. No one is going to advocate for drunk driving but in our search for witches to burn (otherwise known as drivers) in our new crusade, we also catch up people who are innocent and force them to prove that innocence. Usually we do this by binding them up and throwing them in a pond. Because water is pure, if they are guilty the water will reject them, and if they are innocent they drown. Okay, maybe it is slightly more technical, but that is only if you believe the government.
So, here are my solutions to reducing the drunk driving rates in Montana. First, we lead the country in DUIs per mile traveled. Let's take the third Saturday of every month and require everyone to drive to a police station where a breath test will be administered and if you are clean, you then have to drive 500 miles that day. This has the advantage of increasing the numerator so that we won't be leading the country any longer.
Next, I propose that we cut DUIs in half by giving all the cops in the state Saturday off. No cops means no arrests. Ordinary citizens would be instructed not to drive on Saturday night because we surrendered the streets to drunks. But, just like in the '70s when we quit picking up hitchhikers because they all seemed to be serial killers, and people quit hitchhiking because the only people who picked them up were serial killers, eventually with only drunk drivers on the road on Saturday night they will only kill each other. Win-win, and no costs for incarceration or treatment.
Lastly, you need to understand that drinking and driving is not necessarily such a bad thing. For instance, Montana has found that one out of three highway fatalities has alcohol involved. Not necessarily under the influence, as for example the driver who is texting, runs a red light and kills a driver of another car who had two drinks. If you think about it, this means that you are twice as likely to die if you and the other driver are both stone cold sober, than if one of you has a drink. Therefore, in the same spirit of you should always bring a bomb on board any plane you fly, because what are the chances that there are two bombs, we should all have a drink or two and go for a drive.
This solution to a vexing problem is offered gratis as a public service.